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The Song/Poem/Writing Thread - Part 2

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^are you kidding? it's great! :D

:D:hug:

^awesome lyrics :)

 

I've had a hard time writing something I've been proud of for a long time, but I actually like this.

 

Portraying a part

 

distract my tears which blind my eyes

force them to freeze

I want to remember this goodbye

 

spoken heartbreak fills my head

now when I think about it

I just want to forget this

 

I don't want to remember the pain

or the look in your eyes

As if I stabbed you in the back

 

A betrayel of the first degree

and you didn't have the time to plea

I let go when you need me the most

Can not trust

Can not stay

Everything has to fade away

 

a broken promise surfaced today

you blamed it on me

but it didn't make you feel free

 

those hidden words which I used at times

were the ones you found

and I don't remember letting you know

 

will you ever stand on your own

like you do now

but standing with your head held high

 

A betrayel of the first degree

and you didn't have the time to plea

I let go when you need me the most

Can not trust

Can not stay

Everything has to fade away

 

melted promises and empty truths

this will forever be the day

when I explained it to you

 

to touch upon love

has never been what I've done

I've always been acting

portraying a part

a part of a once lost and broken heart

 

what I am doing

has once been done to me

I guess that's why I chose the role

of always make believe

It was familiar to me

 

A betrayel of the first degree

and you didn't have the time to plea

I let go when you need me the most

Can not trust

Can not stay

Everything has to fade away

 

and you! you are truly talented with this girl:wink: awesome as always:hug:

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So, I've never posted in here before. I'm very self-conscience when it comes to my writing, but I thought I would give it a go.

 

Untitled

 

Silence. Encompassing.

Midnight.

 

Sitting in the dark of her room she thought of life. She thought of death. Not in the morbid sense of the word. More in the sense of uncertainty. She did not know when it would come, or how it would overtake her. All she knew is that it would greet her one day.

 

She was not afraid of that fact. She believed in life after death. She believed in heaven. A place of warm rejoicing.

 

She was afraid of how.

 

How would her life on earth cease? She prayed that it would be peaceful. Painless. But one of the biggest things about being a human is that one can never be too sure. That uncertainty scared her.

 

In the midst of this uncertainty, though, she found peace.

 

Enough peace that she felt safe enough to lay her head down on her cold pillow and let her eyelids slide, tired and heavy, over her dark eyes.

 

Enough peace to allow her rest so she could live her remaining days.

 

 

Feedback would be much appreciated.

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So, I've never posted in here before. I'm very self-conscience when it comes to my writing, but I thought I would give it a go.

 

Untitled

 

Silence. Encompassing.

Midnight.

 

Sitting in the dark of her room she thought of life. She thought of death. Not in the morbid sense of the word. More in the sense of uncertainty. She did not know when it would come, or how it would overtake her. All she knew is that it would greet her one day.

 

She was not afraid of that fact. She believed in life after death. She believed in heaven. A place of warm rejoicing.

 

She was afraid of how.

 

How would her life on earth cease? She prayed that it would be peaceful. Painless. But one of the biggest things about being a human is that one can never be too sure. That uncertainty scared her.

 

In the midst of this uncertainty, though, she found peace.

 

Enough peace that she felt safe enough to lay her head down on her cold pillow and let her eyelids slide, tired and heavy, over her dark eyes.

 

Enough peace to allow her rest so she could live her remaining days.

 

 

Feedback would be much appreciated.

 

One word: WOW!!!!

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^^I really like it, it has something special hovering within the textlines, I can't describe what it is, but I like it :)

 

EDIT: meant for Faith.

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One word: WOW!!!!

 

Awww, thanks Ernie.

 

^^I really like it, it has something special hovering within the textlines, I can't describe what it is, but I like it :)

 

EDIT: meant for Faith.

 

Thanks!

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I wrote another thing of prose I guess. I dont know what to make of it, feedback would be lovely.

 

Flaws

 

She got uncomfortable when people told her she was pretty. She didn't see it. At least not to the point that people told her.

 

She saw herself as average. Probably a little less than average actually. She did not like to focus on the positives when it came to her appearance. She dwelled on the negatives ninety-nin percent of the time. And that one percent where she did acknowledge the positive. Well, that was quickly showed by her negative outlook.

 

She thought she was too fat. Too pale. Her nose was too big.

 

She didn't acknowledge anyone when they told her she had a beautiful smile. Or that her eyes we're some of the prettiest that people have seen. Or that her hair was as soft as silk.

 

No. She dwelled on the negatives.

 

She knew it was something she shouldn't do. She knew that beauty was more than just the outward appearance. But at the same time she couldn't help but wonder how life would be if those things she didn't like about herself were different. How she imagined them to be, in a perfect world.

 

But that was just it. Life wasn't perfect. And thats what made her the way she was. Flaws and all.

 

And those flaws that she saw. They were her.

 

They were what she needed to learn to embrace.

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Ventriloquist

 

All your blame lay blessed

Embellished ugly

Yet you kissed

This place with fault

Oh you,

Oh you ventriloquist

 

Stand there and see

My hidden knowledge aimed at you

You're so skilled so you see

Them aimed at me then leave

Can you believe I said that

I said that you can believe

 

Contest yourself

And race for a better way

Before you hurt them too long

Before they throw you away

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a-ma-zing :uhh:

 

I wrote another thing of prose I guess. I dont know what to make of it, feedback would be lovely.

 

Flaws

 

She got uncomfortable when people told her she was pretty. She didn't see it. At least not to the point that people told her.

 

She saw herself as average. Probably a little less than average actually. She did not like to focus on the positives when it came to her appearance. She dwelled on the negatives ninety-nin percent of the time. And that one percent where she did acknowledge the positive. Well, that was quickly showed by her negative outlook.

 

She thought she was too fat. Too pale. Her nose was too big.

 

She didn't acknowledge anyone when they told her she had a beautiful smile. Or that her eyes we're some of the prettiest that people have seen. Or that her hair was as soft as silk.

 

No. She dwelled on the negatives.

 

She knew it was something she shouldn't do. She knew that beauty was more than just the outward appearance. But at the same time she couldn't help but wonder how life would be if those things she didn't like about herself were different. How she imagined them to be, in a perfect world.

 

But that was just it. Life wasn't perfect. And thats what made her the way she was. Flaws and all.

 

And those flaws that she saw. They were her.

 

They were what she needed to learn to embrace.

 

love it :)

 

and Chris, that's awesome :)

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:P I'm back. I forgot all about this thread lol

Another chapter from my story School of Delinquents:

 

You know that feeling you get when the entire school sees your underwear? Maybe not, but it isn’t a nice feeling. Well, at least I was getting a room by myself, in a dorm, in a school. Well, nix the dorm and school part, and this was a paradise. Oh, and minus the people that might mug me any second. Okay, never mind.

My room was in the Nixon Dorm, room twenty-six. The Nixon Dorm, thankfully, was right near the entrance. Room twenty-six, though, was on the third floor, so I had to lug my luggage (three suitcases) up the stairs, and to the room.

As I entered, hot and sweaty, there were two other guys unpacking their clothing. I closed my eyes real tight and opened them again, hoping I was hallucinating. Nope, there were two guys there.

“Uh, I think I have the wrong room, is this the Nixon Dorm, room twenty-six?” I asked.

And big blonde guy turned, looked me up and down, and nodded.

“I thought I was getting my own room, at least a room with girls,” I said.

The other guy, who was older than me and had an Afro, turned and looked at me. I noticed his eyes stayed at my boobs for a while, and they seemed to be distant, like he was fantasizing about something.

“Hello? Am I in the right room?” I waved a hand in front of his face.

“Yeah, you are,” the blonde one said, “Oh, by the way, I’m Bob. This is Ray. We are your new roommates…” he paused for a name.

“Alex.”

“Alex,” he repeated.

“Yeah,” I said, inching towards my bed. This was getting weird, and I was getting a little scared.

Bob turned but Ray still seemed distant. I turned, making him unable to see my boobs, and started unpacking my stuff (underwear, bras, uniforms, make-up, etc) and putting them in a dresser that was already partially full of boxers and socks. Oh, nice. Now I had to dig through a bunch of ick to get to my clothes.

“How do I get to Mrs.Manat’s class?” I asked. No answer.

“Fine, I’ll just find it myself,” I sniffed and left the room.

I had to find a class by myself. Bogus.

I walked all the way down the steps, and to a map in the front office. There was a rather short guy looking at a magazine while his mother signed paperwork.

“Frank, I don’t know why you insist on reading that crap “Fangoria”. It’ll rot your brain,” his mother said. Nice woman (sarcasm, by the way).

“Mom, this will not rot my brain. It’s kickass. Look,” he showed his mom something, her eyes widened to the size of plates. Quickly, she seized the magazine and shoved it in her purse. “Frank Anthony Iero you will not read this shit,” she hissed.

Getting an idea to really get his mom worked up, I walked up to Frank and asked, “Excuse me, where do you keep your balls?”

Frank looked up at me. Damn, he had a cute little Bambi face. If he asked me to give him a blowjob, I would. His eyes were hazel, like that guy I ran into, and was lined with eyeliner and some red eye shadow, his hair was a black fringe with red on the sides, Sexy.

I noticed his mom also looked up when I asked this, just waiting for his answer.

He pointed to his crotch and said, “Right there. Want ‘em?”

There it was. The offer to let me in his pants. I refrained myself to stand there, though, and laughed.

His mom didn’t appreciate this though, “FRANK! Don’t you dare speak to a woman like this! I am so sorry. Frank here is a little on the naughty side. Hopefully this school will change that.”

I nodded, winked at Frank, and left for my first class. He was quite the charmer. I knew I would date him, because I could see it in his eyes that he was attracted to me, and was going to ask me out. One of my great attributes to the world of dating.

Mrs. Manat, turned out, taught in room 107, and was the teacher, and head, of the English department. Oh, yay, English.

The classroom was big, like the ones in college. The ones where the teacher is at the bottom and the desks were like stadium , just towering above her.

I sat at the middle, where everyone could see me in all my beauty. Suddenly, a guy with long light brown hair and glasses put a note on my desk. On it said “2:The Most Amazing Girl 4rm: The Guy.

I opened it eagerly as the guy left. Already I got a note. My day was made. Besides the whole Frank thing, of coarse.

I read the note silently and gasped. On it said.

Girl,

You’re beautiful. I can’t believe I had the chance to see you, an angel, in person. I want to get to know you. Everything, every last detail about you. That guy who delivered this message? Yeah, that’s my brother Mikey. Give a note to him saying where and when you would like to meet up, and I’ll see you there.

Xoxo

That Guy

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It's so good. Did you play the guitar and drums? And you mixed them? Or you have a band?

 

I think this song is a bit Audioslave and RHCP.

Congrats!;-)

 

I played and recorded the guitar, and wrote the drums and bass using Fruity Loops.

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I played and recorded the guitar, and wrote the drums and bass using Fruity Loops.

 

I see. Hopefully you'll write another.

You can be proud of this one, really.

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Can somebody just check over these lyrics please? :P

 

Never felt like this

Don't know how to cope

When you're in my arms

I'm so full of hope

 

Baby I need you round

Almost all the time

To give me this sparkle

(whispered) and this shine

 

How I love you so

You are beautiful

In my arms I love

I love you so much

I finally found the one

The one I know I want

And you're the one

I really really want you!

 

You look so great tonight

You really turn me on

I really need you now

Can't we have some fun?

 

I can't control myself

I know you always say

Whats the point in

All of this anyway?

 

How I love you so

You are beautiful

In my arms I love

I love you so much

I finally found the one

The one I know I want

And you're the one

I really want you!

 

But now, I can hold you

I can stay with you forever more

 

REPEAT

CHORUS X2

 

They're for my GCSE but I really can't write lyrics and I hate these ones :???: (can't come up with anything else (without rude words) though ;-))

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i swear my body's staying faithful

but my my ain't so loyal

well i heard you played these games

just as well as i do.

round two ? bring it, break it,

they're only hearts anyway

they're there for the taking.

 

but pardon me ? rules are made for breaking

but that line, right there,

was the one i was waiting for

crossed over or completely missed

it's showtime, i swear,

hearts and rules are how we make them,

how we break them.

 

game over, along with the clichés

i'd forgotten the reason we played

(in the first place)

my mistake, you were,

you were my mistake.

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:P I'm back. I forgot all about this thread lol

Another chapter from my story School of Delinquents:

 

You know that feeling you get when the entire school sees your underwear? Maybe not, but it isn’t a nice feeling. Well, at least I was getting a room by myself, in a dorm, in a school. Well, nix the dorm and school part, and this was a paradise. Oh, and minus the people that might mug me any second. Okay, never mind.

My room was in the Nixon Dorm, room twenty-six. The Nixon Dorm, thankfully, was right near the entrance. Room twenty-six, though, was on the third floor, so I had to lug my luggage (three suitcases) up the stairs, and to the room.

As I entered, hot and sweaty, there were two other guys unpacking their clothing. I closed my eyes real tight and opened them again, hoping I was hallucinating. Nope, there were two guys there.

“Uh, I think I have the wrong room, is this the Nixon Dorm, room twenty-six?” I asked.

And big blonde guy turned, looked me up and down, and nodded.

“I thought I was getting my own room, at least a room with girls,” I said.

The other guy, who was older than me and had an Afro, turned and looked at me. I noticed his eyes stayed at my boobs for a while, and they seemed to be distant, like he was fantasizing about something.

“Hello? Am I in the right room?” I waved a hand in front of his face.

“Yeah, you are,” the blonde one said, “Oh, by the way, I’m Bob. This is Ray. We are your new roommates…” he paused for a name.

“Alex.”

“Alex,” he repeated.

“Yeah,” I said, inching towards my bed. This was getting weird, and I was getting a little scared.

Bob turned but Ray still seemed distant. I turned, making him unable to see my boobs, and started unpacking my stuff (underwear, bras, uniforms, make-up, etc) and putting them in a dresser that was already partially full of boxers and socks. Oh, nice. Now I had to dig through a bunch of ick to get to my clothes.

“How do I get to Mrs.Manat’s class?” I asked. No answer.

“Fine, I’ll just find it myself,” I sniffed and left the room.

I had to find a class by myself. Bogus.

I walked all the way down the steps, and to a map in the front office. There was a rather short guy looking at a magazine while his mother signed paperwork.

“Frank, I don’t know why you insist on reading that crap “Fangoria”. It’ll rot your brain,” his mother said. Nice woman (sarcasm, by the way).

“Mom, this will not rot my brain. It’s kickass. Look,” he showed his mom something, her eyes widened to the size of plates. Quickly, she seized the magazine and shoved it in her purse. “Frank Anthony Iero you will not read this shit,” she hissed.

Getting an idea to really get his mom worked up, I walked up to Frank and asked, “Excuse me, where do you keep your balls?”

Frank looked up at me. Damn, he had a cute little Bambi face. If he asked me to give him a blowjob, I would. His eyes were hazel, like that guy I ran into, and was lined with eyeliner and some red eye shadow, his hair was a black fringe with red on the sides, Sexy.

I noticed his mom also looked up when I asked this, just waiting for his answer.

He pointed to his crotch and said, “Right there. Want ‘em?”

There it was. The offer to let me in his pants. I refrained myself to stand there, though, and laughed.

His mom didn’t appreciate this though, “FRANK! Don’t you dare speak to a woman like this! I am so sorry. Frank here is a little on the naughty side. Hopefully this school will change that.”

I nodded, winked at Frank, and left for my first class. He was quite the charmer. I knew I would date him, because I could see it in his eyes that he was attracted to me, and was going to ask me out. One of my great attributes to the world of dating.

Mrs. Manat, turned out, taught in room 107, and was the teacher, and head, of the English department. Oh, yay, English.

The classroom was big, like the ones in college. The ones where the teacher is at the bottom and the desks were like stadium , just towering above her.

I sat at the middle, where everyone could see me in all my beauty. Suddenly, a guy with long light brown hair and glasses put a note on my desk. On it said “2:The Most Amazing Girl 4rm: The Guy.

I opened it eagerly as the guy left. Already I got a note. My day was made. Besides the whole Frank thing, of coarse.

I read the note silently and gasped. On it said.

Girl,

You’re beautiful. I can’t believe I had the chance to see you, an angel, in person. I want to get to know you. Everything, every last detail about you. That guy who delivered this message? Yeah, that’s my brother Mikey. Give a note to him saying where and when you would like to meet up, and I’ll see you there.

Xoxo

That Guy

 

amazing :D

 

--------------

 

I wrote a song a couple of minutes ago, here it is. :) Comments would be lovely.

 

My December Wish

 

 

Now I've had enough of all the

broken promises and empty words

I'm picking up my already packed bags

they've been collecting dust

for quite a while now

 

I can't stick around for another tear to show

My heart is torn apart

and it's pieces I can't hold

on to something that's been damaged for a long time

So my december wish comes true right now

I'm going to leave you tonight

 

Three lousy words that just didn't mean a thing

but spoken truly, they would have meant everything

but you never got the message

that a heart is something fragile

and not a toy, that's why

 

I can't stick around for another tear to show

My heart is torn apart

and it's pieces I can't hold

on to something that's been damaged for a long time

So my december wish comes true right now

I'm going to leave you tonight

 

I didn't think you would change at all

I always knew that you were a player at heart

But what's a girl to do

when all she wants is a fairytale to come true

 

I can't stick around for another tear to show

My heart is torn apart

and it's pieces I can't hold

on to something that's been damaged for a long time

So my december wish comes true right now

I'm going to leave you tonight

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Enemy

 

We have such little lives

And we're waiting for hell

There's nothing complimenting here

There's just nothing nice to tell

You, My enemy

 

You hate me, And then I hate you

We'll betray what's fair

Because we care

So our hate is done

But without us

Nothing would be fun

With you, My enemy

 

I've lost what's right

Thanks to this world

My conscience is never well

As I am here knowing

I'm waiting for hell

 

I don't love myself

And I distort my reality

I don't love anyone

Because no one else has loved me

We're the wicked ones

We're the ones that have a job to do

We need to be the ugly ones

We're here for them to see

That's why I hate them and

You, My Enemy

 

 

 

 

I haven't done anything in awhile so.

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ok so i haven't written in awhile due to writers block which has sucked

anyways i just wrote a new one, it's not my best..

 

Nightmare

 

Surrounding, attacking

It overpowers me

I lose control

I feel the absolute terror

Breathing erratic

Heart pounding

It's happening again

As i stop fighting it wins

No control, nothing left

Tears stream down my face

Screaming out loud

I'm left dazed

This is not real

Not real, but it is

A nightmare never ending

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Wrote this last night in a fit of disappointment after talking to the guy I used to like. Writing helps me get over people.

 

Heartbreak is a Horrible Feeling

 

He was exactly what she dreamed of. Nice, smart, witty, creative, handsome. Actually, when she thought about it, he was just the type of guy she saw herself marrying. She always wished to marry a musician, and that was exactly what he was. A good musician at that.

 

The only problem was he didn’t see her in the same light. Sure, she was sweet, intelligent, clever, artistic and pretty. But he just didn’t find her to be what he was looking for.

 

And she knew that.

 

Simply because she heard him talking about the girl he was looking for. The girl he was hoping would steal his heart and possibly be the girl he always dreamed of marrying. The way he described her made her sound perfect, especially for him.

 

As he spoke, the girl wished that one day a boy like him would say those things about her. She hoped it would happen sometime soon, but in the bottom of her heart she had a feeling it wouldn’t. She was a pessimist in that way.

 

As she walked from the room to leave, she couldn’t help but look back at him. He was on his phone. A smile was plastered on his face and she had a feeling she knew who was on the other end of the line.

 

She wished it was her.

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