Renith182

I totally resisted the urge the other night. At the end of the day its not gonna help my situation. Besides im on a fuckin roll! That One cigerette is enough to get me back into it. Maybe even smoking more. and Jorgi. I just hope you aint giving that type of advice to everyone whose quitting or has quit! Cause thats one of the biggest urges to resist! that ONE ciggie! Ren

Its been 5 weeks since i quit. 5 weeks holy shit. But i feel like a trainwreck right now. The last two days are harder than the first two days of quitting. I feel like im so close to relapsing right now and trying to keep it straight. I don't want to fail so bad, but at the same time i feel the strongest urge to have one. I will try to keep it straight, because im just trying to think about all the bad times and shitty things about smoking. Its typical behavior of trying to have one, and im resisting it. at this very moment the daily grind of life has gotten to me and the novelty of quitting has kinda died off. Im so scared that maybe, just maybe absence is making my heart grow fonder for one again.

Thats shitty! My old man used to smoke in front of me aswell. Prolly a reason to how i started. You should tell her its HURTING YOU, and that its making you feel sick all the time. And about the money thing, its a smokers irrational thoughts. Even with me i was broke ass but i'd still spend 240 bucks on ciggies a month. Tell her how her habit is robbing money from yer family and how hypocritical that shit is. I guess theres no subtle tway to get people to kick the habit. Fuck. I thought they have them on the packets already? I dunno how graphic they are in Ireland. And you're right its all about will power. My life at the moment is smoke free. And it doenst feel that much different. I've found ways to Adapt and do different things besides smoke. More constructive things. At the end of the day its Change. They say old habits die hard. Some people will die due to their lack of ability to adapt and just Change their life. Ren

Thanks!!! Its going well! Haha getting closer to being edge. Well If you end up getting some with those girls while your friend is outside smoking away then even not edge, but lucky! haha. Thanks! Your repulsion to cigarette smoke is your sensitivity and intolerance to nicotine. like how some people get hammered on one beer. And getting family and friends to stop is alot easier said than done. For me it was a personal decision to stop smoking, and it has to be for your family and friends aswell. In other words If there isn't a conscious effort to quit, then they wont quit. Ren Yeah no kidding. Maybe its a persons ability to control their compulsiveness

3 weeks since i quit smoking It feels great. Im trying to learn to sing properly. Could never even try much when i was a smoker. Stopped hacking up nasty shit. Everything seems a little easier going. It's a new type of 'Normal' and im loving it so far. Shits been fucked in my life in the last week and a half, but i never caved in, because even though i hit some nasty fuckin brickwalls, smoking ain't gonna get me out of the rut. I guess better to be healthy and miserable than dying and miserable? Ren

Then let them know how you truly feel about it! Or take their ciggies from them and throw them away and rip them up and shit. Whatever you can do to make smoking for them a miserable hell! Or accidently run over by drunk cops.. or SHOT! Cool man thats awesome that you stopped smoking even under social situations. I hope you can still have fun and whatnot and it doesnt feel like something is always missing, cause it isnt really.

One week smoke free Still feeling great. dont have the jitters anymore. Still hacking shit up during the day. Working hard, havnt been working out the last two days, but will get back into it Not needing so much to distract me from cravings anymore, snacking less eating less. Everything in life smells and tastes alot nicer. Car doesnt smell like shit. Breathing is good. Getting a little fatter, but gonna try get jacked. One week of not smoking has saved me 60 bucks. 60 bucks to go towards something else. Still broke ass, just less broke ass. Overall its all good. Getting back into the daily grind. Trying to find other things to do with my life Ren

Jail huh? Hope it wasnt too bad, but hope u learned from the consequences. Did the RCMP beat you? or tazer you? just curious because they seem to think they're above the law nowadays, especially with this olympics thing. Well at least you're getting rid of two bad habits. Like a drug addict from rehab, I think they encourage you to smoke. I didn't say Canadian weed overall. weed from BRITISH COLUMBIA (a province in canada). Perfect growing conditions for it. Same as ice wine, only canadian ice wine is TRUE ice wine. You dont buy into the hype but you've never smoked it. Its a 6 billion dollar a year underground economy in BC, so if that doesnt account for anything... As for weed i guess its not as addictive as ciggies . But if you wake up stupid one day from smoking too much, you wont be able to know because you're too stupid to realize? haha. and we all know the only cure for stupid is a bullet to the head! I figured all the stupid drivers and jaywalkers who are completely oblivious to anything are all high as kites. Thanks for your support love!

Its been 5 days since i quit, and even though my lungs are sore and im hacking up some nasty shit (part of withdrawal) with my body clearing out all the bad stuff i feel fucking great. Its more the healing process that is bothering me than the cravings itself. its alright though, No pain no gain. Its almost given me a new lease on life, because i've rid myself of a burden. I gotta say though since i was addicted to it for a long time, it will be a challenge to keep myself smoke free. Im sure in the future there will be thoughts of smoking again. Because like any recovering addict, there will always be temptations in the future. Its a daunting task thinking about having to stay this way for the rest of my life. But as i always like to say, things in life that are easy, arnt really worth it! I just hope that its not so hard that i give up. At this very moment though im about to go for a run. The highs of working out again without feeling the negative effects of tobacco are keeping me off the bad shit. replacing my smoking with keeping active really helps, since the highs from a good workout take away any cravings of needing a smoke. On top of that it just feels like progress in my life. One less thing holding me back. Thinking back i realized alot of things smoking had already taken from me. And maybe even held me back from realizing my full potential. Most of all i'd like to thank all ya fellas for your support! and i hope some of my thoughts have helped you aswell! Thanks again! Ren

Your difficulty with quitting while partying is probably because of the drinking you do with it. You're judgement isnt as good when drinking and u tend to use your feelings to make decisions instead of your head. Whether you smoke 1 a week, 1 a day or 40 a day, smoking is still smoking. still has associated risks, though its not as bad for you since u smoke less. I know alot of musicians who smoke, figured it was part of the image. haha. But i guess if it makes you broke ass you cant do all the things u want to. Alot of people forget smoking can tie you down financially. Like i said in a previous post, im in a city where the best weed in the world is. It seems like some of the activists and people who smoke a shitload of the stuff, actually tend to get stupid after a while. Its almost as if IQ goes down the shithole when they smoke too much of it. Its still not good for people. Sounds like you've replaced smoking ciggies for smoking weed. Though understandable, its like one addiction to another, but i guess everyone has to pick their poison. I agree with you that Alcohol is worse than both. You always hear people dying and killing other people from drunk driving. But smoking rarely ever kills anyone while driving (Unless u drop your ciggie and take your eyes off the road to find it). Alcohol ruins more shit than anything else. I dont remember smokers going back home wanting to beat their wife and kids. Though a friend of mine said the worse thing in the world is gambling. In one day, you can only smoke, drink, shoot up and snort so much shit until you pass out. But u can lose everything you have in one hand in gambling. As for moderation, its a tricky balancing act and you can definitely go down the wrong road with that shit. Sometimes not doing it at all can help. Well people may have prejudice against smokers, but smoking and ciggies dont have prejudice against anyone. Doesn't matter what race, colour, sex, age, class you are, it will still try its best to take your life. You're lucky to have parents like yours though. Haha The germans i knew in high school were fuckin chimneys. As for how you started, kinda the same way i did. was curious as to what these "Lucky strike" and Marlboro ciggies were all about. Problem is alot of kids who start have a hard time quitting, even if their thoughts change. Its probably worse because you will associate your childhood memories with smoking. As for smokers, Everyone from peasants to politicians like it. I hear Obama likes his ciggies aswell. A guy running a fuckin country likes to smoke. I guess you're parents are trying to promote the right thing to do with the wrong reasons? whatever its the thought that counts right? Im sorry to hear about your struggles with family. Their lives were not taken in vain because it taught you an important lesson in life. I thank you for your support aswell. You're stories reinforce my willpower to quit. When you get down and dirty and really think about it, its the most stupid thing ever. But its something that alot of people have a love hate relationship with. Its good that you've learned from the self destructive behavior of the people you love. Unfortunately for 8 years of my life, I mimiced that behavior in hopes of maybe finding some closure, but at the end of the day i got black lungs, but still a heart of gold. And it does feel amazing to have quit. It feels like im 15 again, though i still have some withdrawal symptoms i only know it can get better. Thanks again for your support! Stay away from that shit!

Interesting story fran! Its how how 'peer' pressure can make u do and not do things aswell. I know you dont mean to be condescending, but not all smokers come from bad backgrounds. My parents brought me up good too, and taught me some valuable lessons in my life (though i learned some of that shit the hard way). My old man used to smoke and used to do it in front of me (respected businessman), so i guess big paychecks dont mean good judgement outside of work. Im glad you quit smoking, and for whatever reasons it doesnt matter because at the end of the day u quit. But judging from the sound of things, it seems like your family is pretty hard on you eh? Seems like Image and how things look from the outside are very different from how things REALLY are on the inside? I have the same experiences with my family, and it seems oppressive sometimes that i have to live up to other peoples expectations so ive made an active decision to not do so. Because at the end of the day, my life is my life to live and good decisions are my decisions to make and my mistakes are MY mistakes to live with, but at least they are mine. Strangely i have a feeling that this pressure from your family might've been the reason why u started smoking in the first place. Wanting to try different things, and wanting to rebel in general? haha. This pressure on image and how you represent your family can cause people to find escapes. Prolly the same reason celebrities do irrational things and get on the front page of the tabloids. Im not passing judgement on you or anything, but is the reason for quitting was somewhat related to smoking in the first place, it might be something you want to address. Ren

Thanks man you're support is much appreciated. My lungs are aching right now, but still in the withdrawal stage and prolly soon will be hacking up some nasty stuff. You're headaches are the same ones my mom gets. Every person is different, and i think like my mom, you are extremely sensitive to nicotine. Obviously smokers like drinkers build up tolerances to nicotine and alcohol. Good thing though, because it keeps you away from that shit. Ive known friends who find themselves going into bars not to smoke, but to smell second hand smoke, because they've been exposed to it for so long. As for your grandfather im sorry to hear about that. It Must've been very traumatizing dealing with that shit your whole teenage life, but at least you came out the right way from it. I was thinking about this earlier and the way my father smoked for over 20 years. Reading labels on packs of smokes saying that kids of smokers have the higher chance of starting. I figured it could go both ways and you and i are perfect examples of it. Both of us have family we care and love and look up to, who smoke. Looking at it deeper, my old man used to drink, work till he had chronic stress disorder, stopped caring about anything including myself and my mom. Its all SELF DESTRUCTIVE behavior. I guess for you, seeing self destructive behavior in the people you care about has warned u to stay away from that type of lifestyle. I guess for me seeing this behavior in someone i looked up to and care about made me want to mimic it in some strange way. I almost mimiced the lifestyle of my role model and thought it would work for me. Now i realize my old man made alot of mistakes and so have i. Not to mention he used to smoke constantly in front of me when we would spend time together, so i guess sometimes smelling smoke would remind me of those good days. But you're right, it is very hard to convince some people to quit. After all even though it is a very selfish act (Second hand smoke) it is entirely their choice to smoke or to not smoke. My old man quit because the doctor told him he would have serious complications in his health in the next 10 years (which was 12 years ago) and hes still around. For me the smoking seemed to be affecting my whole life. For the last 2 months before i quit i had been depressed, had thoughts of offing myself, and was just having a hard time keeping shit straight (affecting friends, work etc.). Went to see the doctor and suggested smoking could be having an affect on my physical and mental wellbeing. Self destructive behavior. Thinking back in the 8 years i had been smoking, only the first 3 or 4 years were the times i actually enjoyed smoking (felt headrushes, genuine relaxed feelings etc). But recently before i quit i noticed i didn't enjoy even one of the 20 or so i had during the day. And it occured to me that i was paying big money (240 plus bucks a month almost 3 grand a year) to do something i didn't enjoy and was killing me slowly. Doesnt make any sense. At that point i knew i was addicted, because i was doing something for the fuck of it, and it didn't make any sense. I made a decision a few days ago that living my life by CHANCE was too hard to swallow, and that the amount of money i spent in my life could probably buy me the nicest coffin and gravestone in the cemetery. So yeah buddy, try to keep convincing your relatives to quit. I read a story where a wife tried to get her husband to quit smoking. Her method was pestering him and making him feel bad about what he was doing. Everytime he bought a pack of cigarettes or a carton, she would throw the same amount of he spent on it down the gutter. When the husband would ask why, she would say what im doing is wasting money, but at least it wouldnt hurt anybody. Haha sounds crazy but shit like that might just work. I guess in your case, make sure its not YOUR money Ren Its all good man lemme know your thoughts later. Smoking the 'Green' stuff isnt all fun and games either. Living in British Columbia, Canada where the best weed in the world is found, i deal with alot of people who like the shit. They always say that smoking weed is healthier than cigarettes. Yes Cigarettes have alot of chemicals inserted into it that weed doesnt have but smoke is smoke. Whenever someone tells me that, i always ask them that if they went into the forest and chopped down a tree and set it on fire, is that good for them? Most of them say no its not good for you. So whats fucking difference with smoking weed which is also 'natural'. Im not advocating a straight edge lifestyle, Just dont be living in denial of the lifestyle you choose. Not shitting on you Harry haha, its just not as good as everyone says it is. I see weed smokers hacking up green and red shit aswell.

Nobody plans on doing it. Sometimes it just happens. Just make sure it doesnt haha. Funny you say that, because i remember my first 6 months of smoking the headrushes i got. One in particular was before an english exam i had to do. I remember having 1 1/2 hours to do it, but i was pretty much staring at a blank page for an hour because i couldnt gather any thoughts. After the headrush passed though i got 4 pages in half an hour and actually passed haha. I noticed now that i also got a rush of sneaking around school and my neibourhood finding places to smoke in peace. Maybe at the time i was a dumbass and wanted to get out of the house so i didn't have to hear what my rents had to say. Good that you quit though! You can only lie so much until you get caught in one of them. She probably knows aswell. Most parents do. Back in the day people didn't have a problem with smokers. Nowadays though alot of people frown upon smokers. I guess what you're experiencing when near a smoker is having the shoe on the other foot. Same with me. I guess we're lucky most governments are discouraging public smoking, to discourage smoking overall. Carry some gum around with you so when you feel like smoking, chew it to distract your thoguhts! Hope it helps! Ren

Thanks for your support man! Btw I was in Melbourne this time last year! Went to see my best friend and some other old friends from high school. Beautiful city man! Spent alot of time downtown at DeGraves st having good breakfast and good italian food aswell! Alot of time in Dangerfield. Gotta say its alot better than hot topic! Wearing one of their hoodies right now . Went to Soundwave festival with my buddy last year aswell. Fuckin envious that he gets to go this year while im stuck in Canada, Cause warped tour sucked balls last year and it seems like you fellas are getting all the good bands! Shitty about the fires and the fact that u can't take a shower for longer than 5 minutes without getting shit! haha. Sorry i enjoyed my 2 weeks there so its nice to reminisce. You guys definitely got it good down there. As for the smoking, im sorry to hear thats the case. For me when i started i enjoyed smoking very much. I guess at first i loved the act but as the years went by it became more of an addiction (prolly more the fact thats its just a fuckin bad habit). But i know your situation because i knew alot of guys back in school who smoked socially. One of my closest friends (at the time) used to smoke alot at parties when he was trashed. Thing is tho even though i havnt talked to him in almost 5 years, word on the street is that hes a pack a day smoker now. Funny thing is hes going to school to be a doctor. It sure seems like its peer pressure thats causing u to continually smoke at parties. Prolly best to just let them know you're trying to quit, if they dont support you they're not worth hanging out with because friends should help other friends out. If its more of an association with alcohol, i dunno what to say really. I never really drank that much in my life, though i figured u want to smoke because willpower goes out the window when you're drunk, and causes u to do and think irrational things. i guess the closest thing is coffee and smoking for me. One of my favorite things. well was. I still drink coffee and sometimes get the urge to smoke but i realize that im better off without it because as much as it complemented each other, it did affect the good taste of it haha. Before i quit smoking had been affecting my mental and physical well being. Couldn't keep my life and thoughts straight. Was getting in the way of my work and was getting sloppy. Made me a lil paranoid aswell cause its fuckin with my body chemistry. felt that a change for the positive was needed, and felt that a smoke free life was the solution to many of those problems. can't say that i've regret my decision so far. This website helped me out with alot of my questions when it came to quitting smoking. http://www.whyquit.com/ I read every article, and it helps with dealing with withdrawal symptoms aswell. Lets just say the last time i quit and failed, i realized that i wasn't addressing some of my body's needs during withdrawal, which made it ever more difficult. Read these articles and let me know if you have a change of heart. If u think really hard about smoking, there aint a positive to it. Its full of irrational thought similar to being a drug addict. which is pretty much what it is. Problem is its too easy and cheap to get a fix and governments make alot of money off this shit so its hard to quit. But like i said in the previous post man, withdrawal symptoms are prolly nothing compared to finding out u got some fucking form of cancer and you're days are numbered. A point of no return and big regrets. Even though most smokers know the risks, i just dont wanna be one of those guys down the line getting the news and asking "Why me? Why did i have to get this". CAn;t be one of those assholes. And besides man, From what i remember, the fuckin smokes down there tasted like shit anyway. haha. Well hope it works out man! Ren Thanks! Don't get into that situation! its not worth it. Im sure you've been tempted or at the very least curious, but stay away from it. You're a non smoker now, and dont think it will make your life any better if you think its not that great. It only gets worse becoming a smoker.

Yeah man. The Majority of smokers i knew including myself, found that smoking helped to pass time very well. Different people are affected to different degrees of addiction. before sept last year. i hadn't drank in almost 3 years. Even now i drink every now and then but dont crave it or need it. Just happened I got addicted to it a lil more than anything else. Guess growing up and spending time with my old man who smoked 2 packs a day didn't help.Its been 48 hours. Just spent 2 1/2 hours in the gym. feels great and i think the worst of the cravings should be over. Good thing you quit aswell. I guess going outside for fresh air has a different meaning now. Thanks! its working out great so far. Better than the last time i quit. I guess i've made up my mind that i dont really wanna pay to kill myself and not even enjoy it. Well u gotta quit for yourself girl. If being bitchy is how you are, in the long run smoking aint gonna help that. I've found myself more confrontational in the last 48 hours since i quit. Because if someone gives u a hard time, normally you would just smoke it away and forget about it. But now I realize that i dont have that buffer anymore, and if the guy wanted to give me a hard time ill make sure they get it back. No need to kill myself slowly cause i was too pussy to lay it on a person. As far as health goes, that sucks. I guess i never was very athletic but the smoking never helped me get closer to getting in shape. Driving around everywhere doesnt help either. Unfortunately You are experiencing one of the many negatives of smoking. At least its getting you thinking though. Its all in your head. I quit cold turkey. its the hardest method, but so far hasnt been as bad as i anticipated. I think something harder than that would be coughing out blood and finding your days are numbered because u have fuckin cancer. At least if u wanted to off yourself with a gun u had the choice of pulling the trigger or not. With cancer chances are u only have one choice. Give it a thought. How much are u willing to give up to become yourself again. Smoking involves alot of irrational thought. Hunting for smokes. Anxiety from lack of smokes. Justifying it even sounds irrational. I guess the real question is are you willing to DIE for a habit or a thing u think you love doing? But i guess the point is.. u still go back to it after a few weeks