The last thread

[XMusicDudetteX]

I think a person should just act how they are. If you have something to say, just say it. Better than pretending to be something you are not or pretending to feel a certain way you do not.

[thebrowncoat]

You're exactly right - we expect everyone on here to treat each other with respect...and for us not to do that ourselves is completely wrong. These were isolated incidents - it's not like there was a whole thread devoted to bashing board members - not even close - but it doesn't excuse them in the least. What I did was wrong and again, I'm extremely sorry. It was hypocritical of me and the only thing I can say is that it was isolated frustration and me taking out my bad days on others...and there's no reason to ever do that. I'm so sorry.

 

I think this can still be a great board and a great site if we get back to what we all came here to do - meet other fans of Paramore, make friendships and promote and help the band...hopefully, we can do that, but I understand that it's definitely going to take some time...I know how much the band themselves really loved and respected the vibe that this site had...and it's a shame that we've lost some of that, through my actions and the actions of others...but I think we can get it back and put this behind us...

 

I know I want to...but it's ultimately not for me to decide. I hope you guys feel the same way. I really do.

[clowdiaa]

I think a person should just act how they are. If you have something to say, just say it. Better than pretending to be something you are not or pretending to feel a certain way you do not.

 

 

totally, thats something i hold to my heart.

 

staying true.

 

one of the hardest things to do in life is to forgive yourself. and when everyone in this forum whose done wrong realizes this, they will achieve forgiveness from everyone else naturally.

 

we have a long road now, but i have no doubt that this forum will make it through.

[laurenlikewoah]

I'm kind of dissapointed, people can't go around holding up the rules and then shit talk people, that's kind of a rule of life that you're breaking there.

And as I think that it was good to get this info out there, I think maybe there was a better way than posting private type stuff. I'm not condoning the action, but the definitley the intention.

Secondly, just don't talk about people. It's not cool. Everyone is going to have qualities you don't like, but they're probaly amazing, kind people that you would be blessed to get to know.

Since I hardly ever post, and don't have any like close friends on here, I don't want people to be like, wtf does she know about anything? I just felt the need ro say something, cause this is kind of shady shit. So... my proposal: This is private stuff. Apologize to people individually. Then issue one big public apology, just like, I'm sorry if I ever said anything hurtful or mean about to anyone... And then move on to respect everyone, all the time.

But pfans.com should move on, it's too much of a good site to wallow on this.

Okay, that's it. I'm done.

[kristina]

oh wow. im seriously shocked and in disgust. what happened to the big happy family we all were?!?! im really suprised at some people for acting this way seriously. I think we have alot of issues here that need to be worked out. i think this post needed to come out because there are things that need to be changed around here. because this cyber drama shouldnt be happening ya know? we are all here to support Paramore and their music. we all came toghther for this cause. i do appreciate that some of you have stepped up and apologized for your actions because i know the people that were talked about definately definately dont deserve to be talked about that like that. especially one person in particular that im not going to name but i feel that, that was totally uncalled for about them. im kinda good friends with them, i have been now for awhile and that just was down right mean. i think we all need to pick ourseleves up and just be forgiving. eventho i know it probably hurt everyone but id rather people work things out then have everyone that i love keep leaving the boards. ive been here for awhile now & people have come and gone and its just not the same especially without the older memebrs. i want to apologize in the even that i have ever said anything mean or anything about anyone. i apologize. i think everyone can grow from this and just move forward. we might have trust issues now but we'll have to work on that. i think everyone can get through this. well i had to get that out there i have kept my mouth shut out of this for awhile now. but yeah i think everyone can work through this to be the Pf family we once were!

[HarlequinGerhl]

You're exactly right - we expect everyone on here to treat each other with respect...and for us not to do that ourselves is completely wrong. These were isolated incidents - it's not like there was a whole thread devoted to bashing board members - not even close - but it doesn't excuse them in the least. What I did was wrong and again, I'm extremely sorry. It was hypocritical of me and the only thing I can say is that it was isolated frustration and me taking out my bad days on others...and there's no reason to ever do that. I'm so sorry.

 

I think this can still be a great board and a great site if we get back to what we all came here to do - meet other fans of Paramore, make friendships and promote and help the band...hopefully, we can do that, but I understand that it's definitely going to take some time...I know how much the band themselves really loved and respected the vibe that this site had...and it's a shame that we've lost some of that, through my actions and the actions of others...but I think we can get it back and put this behind us...

 

I know I want to...but it's ultimately not for me to decide. I hope you guys feel the same way. I really do.

 

yeah

i agree

and i think its big of you to stand up and admit what you did was wrong

 

i miss the way the boards used to be

because i know that to alot of us this is a place we come to, to like, chill out and be united by the love for the band

and thats why it was pretty crushing to read that when they were being written by people i used to look up too

 

i think the site can recover from this

actually im pretty sure it will

but i think it will never be quite the same

which sucks

because alot of that respect is gone

i just think the people involved should just begin trying to rebuild that

which brent has begun to do

and i think that was very big of him

 

i just wish others would follow suit

[clowdiaa]

oh wow. im seriously shocked and in disgust. what happened to the big happy family we all were?!?! im really suprised at some people for acting this way seriously. I think we have alot of issues here that need to be worked out. i think this post needed to come out because there are things that need to be changed around here. because this cyber drama shouldnt be happening ya know? we are all here to support Paramore and their music. we all came toghther for this cause. i do appreciate that some of you have stepped up and apologized for your actions because i know the people that were talked about definately definately dont deserve to be talked about that like that. especially one person in particular that im not going to name but i feel that, that was totally uncalled for about them. im kinda good friends with them, i have been now for awhile and that just was down right mean. i think we all need to pick ourseleves up and just be forgiving. eventho i know it probably hurt everyone but id rather people work things out then have everyone that i love keep leaving the boards. ive been here for awhile now & people have come and gone and its just not the same especially without the older memebrs. i want to apologize in the even that i have ever said anything mean or anything about anyone. i apologize. i think everyone can grow from this and just move forward. we might have trust issues now but we'll have to work on that. i think everyone can get through this. well i had to get that out there i have kept my mouth shut out of this for awhile now. but yeah i think everyone can work through this to be the Pf family we once were!

 

 

 

cyberdrama

 

i love that word haha.

 

 

but on a more serious note, we will overcome this.

 

we just got to remember the reason we came to this site in the first place, for PARAMORE.

 

to support them.

[clowdiaa]

this quote im gonna post, i think can really help this site. its the quote i hold dearly to my heart, said by Eleanor Roosevelt

 

"Great minds discuss ideas. Average minds discuss events. Small minds discuss people."

 

 

we obviously all can be great, genuine people.

 

its inside every single one of us.

 

all some of us have to do is look a little harder than others do.

[Trevor]

Ownage.

[little_caro]

PF Boards supposed to be a very nice place.

you know my home, but now....

I dont know what to say.

[GerBertMcWay]

LOLOLOLOL what the fuck?

 

ghfjk I actually have to bounce right now, but I'll be sure to come back asap!

[FeRo]

Thanks Lisa and Chris and FeRo (ack - I hate when I don't know someone's real name...sorry!)...that's really well said on all of your parts....

 

 

 

 

Its Fernando, but everyone calls me Fero, so thats ok.

 

Its ok Brent, the attitude over here has always been very possitive, and we can work things out.

[whatsername104]

It suprised me when this information was first presented to me. Suprised, and disgusted me. It definetly played a role in my decision to leave the boards. However, if I see that certain people on here are comitted to changing how some things work around here, I may want to stay. Maybe not like how it used to be, but certainly be a prescence here. I have a lot of friends here and this site has been a part of my life for almost a year. I think changes must be made and Diego was absolutely justified in posting this. It needed to come out, and things need to change. Now that I see it could happen, I am viewing things differently.

 

I believe posting this was the right thing to do. You can leave something behind and unburied, but someone will stumble across it eventually, and it could make things worse. If things had gone on the way they had been going, more people could have been hurt. I've seen Alyssa, Diego, Ash and Brent doing the most on this site, and I continue to have respect for all of them and my friendships with Alyssa and Diego will continue even after their time here. But those staffers have been very dedicated to this site and I believe that they DO deserve respect. And we do too - the people on this forum, we're part of this family as well. What was said was not respectful to us AT ALL. Even if we weren't one of the people talked about, it was still a breach of respect and trust. If they can talk about a few of us that way, they wouldn't think twice before opening their mouths about the rest of us.

 

But now that it has come out, I really hope for the best. I apologized in earlier threads for some harsh words said, and one of the things I was sorry for was thinking these boards could be brought down so easily. I believe everyone on here is a family, and as such we need to learn to work through things together - thick and thin, right?

 

I believe Brent was sincere, and I don't harbor hatred or anything of the like for him, since I do believe he has been genuine and has come clean with us. While I don't know how the others whose words have been put on display here will act, I respect Brent for stepping forward and taking responsibility. I believe that is one of the hardest things in life to do, and it shows maturity on his part, even if his words that Diego showed us haven't. While the harsh words have not gone unnoticed, they can certainly be buried in the past if one believes in forgiveness strongly enough. I used to think revenge and hate was the answer, but I suppose I've grown from that. Feelings like that won't solve anything. We all love this band and these boards and for the most part, eachother. It's about time we started showing it, in the right way.

 

I may be echoing a bunch of Jarrod's words (he said it perfectly), but forgiveness is key to family. We all do things we regret, but it's how we handle the situation afterwards that can change everything. Hopefully the next time someone wants to speak ill of the people on here, they think twice. Don't ever think you need to stand down and take it, and Diego is showing us that positive can come from negative. Like I said earlier, we deserve as much respect as anyone. But one of the people who said things has stepped forward and apologized. We've already made progress. Let's keep going forward.

 

i'm just going to agree with this and move on =]

[Ashhh]

I just wanna say that I love you guys.

 

Diego, thanks for coming clean yourself and for your kind words about me. I don't really think I'm as kind as you think because I'm sure I've said harsh things in the past as well and for them I'm really sorry too.

 

Brent, I'm really proud of you. I know you're sincere and I think everything will be alright. Try not to get so worried about it cause you've done all you can really and just... everything will be alright.

 

I love honesty omg.

 

And also, I'm not gonna be on the boards for a few days so I probably won't get to read your response right away Diego, but I will when I can... just letting you know so you don't think I'm avoiding you. And I'll probably be signed onto AIM on my phone too, so you could IM me if you feel like you should.

[Locomotion]

I just wanna say that I love you guys.

 

Diego, thanks for coming clean yourself and for your kind words about me. I don't really think I'm as kind as you think because I'm sure I've said harsh things in the past as well and for them I'm really sorry too.

 

Brent, I'm really proud of you. I know you're sincere and I think everything will be alright. Try not to get so worried about it cause you've done all you can really and just... everything will be alright.

 

I love honesty omg.

 

And also, I'm not gonna be on the boards for a few days so I probably won't get to read your response right away Diego, but I will when I can... just letting you know so you don't think I'm avoiding you. And I'll probably be signed onto AIM on my phone too, so you could IM me if you feel like you should.

 

 

I am sorry that youre feeling sick.

I knew some good was going to come out of this.

and thats good.

 

and I do think youre that kind. I have seen it

[GerBertMcWay]

And to GerbertMcWay, parawhore815 and Itsgettingcloser - that was one of my bad days. Really bad days. I don't even know you guys that well and I took out some external frustrations on you all in a staff thread. I was frustrated with a lot of stuff I was dealing with, both site related and not related at all to the site...and it came out as me mocking you. That's no excuse though - I sincerely apologize to all three of you. I never should have done it.

 

haha well i know we've never gotten along, and probably won't but i'm okay with that.

 

i like to argue, and you more than anyone argue back.

i don't take anything here too seriously, and i'm never like actually angry while i'm agruing or even really think much about it afterwards. i like stating my opinions and i actually like having you here to clash with.

so sorry if my agruing with you has ever made you mad or anything.

[jtrosper]

yeah

i agree

and i think its big of you to stand up and admit what you did was wrong

 

i miss the way the boards used to be

because i know that to alot of us this is a place we come to, to like, chill out and be united by the love for the band

and thats why it was pretty crushing to read that when they were being written by people i used to look up too

 

i think the site can recover from this

actually im pretty sure it will

but i think it will never be quite the same

which sucks

because alot of that respect is gone

i just think the people involved should just begin trying to rebuild that

which brent has begun to do

and i think that was very big of him

 

i just wish others would follow suit

 

this is exactly how i feel.

 

im only gonna post one time on this.....

 

i commend you on coming clean brent.

 

EDIT: this question pertains to anyone that was talkin shit in the staff room....

im just curious if this would have all come about if diego never ripped Miz Biz or if jarrod wouldnt have pressed the envelope [so to speak]?

 

or would yall still have been talkin shit about some people?

 

i just feel weird about the way that this is all coming out now. ive lost a lot of respect.

[clowdiaa]

 

 

i commend you on coming clean brent. but im just curious if this would have all come about if diego never ripped Miz Biz?

 

or would yall still have been talkin shit about some people?

 

 

i was actually thinking about this earlier...

 

funny thing is, when paramore wrote in their LJ about being ashamed which somewhat inspired Misery Business...it seems as this has brought out some of the most shamful things on PF.com.

 

life works in very funny ways.

[thegreenmansaid]

i was actually thinking about this earlier...

 

funny thing is, when paramore wrote in their LJ about being ashamed which somewhat inspired Misery Business...it seems as this has brought out some of the most shamful things on PF.com.

 

life works in very funny ways.

 

^ I agree entirely.

 

I'd already known some of this information beforehand, so my level of shock has somewhat deteriorated.

 

But what did shock me when I logged into this board was the level of peacefulness and calmness. I'll admit, I was expecting a full-scale mutiny against the staff, but what I saw was a bunch of extremely mature responses and apologies, and I'm really proud of this board and all it's members for being able to do so. I know some people won't find it easy to accept many of the apologies, specifically people who were directly mentioned, but what's important is that you guys took the high road and admitted you'd been wrong. And that eased a lot of the tension in this forum.

 

So what I'm trying to say is...

 

Awe shucks, I'm just so happy with everybody.

 

Group hug!!!

 

(Yeah, that was me trying to ease the tension further)

 

Haha.

 

As for my opinion, well, I don't really have one. I don't know the circumstances that led the staff members to say those things, and I'm not going to base an opinion on a one-sided view.

[Ive seen love die_]

But what did shock me when I logged into this board was the level of peacefulness and calmness. I'll admit, I was expecting a full-scale mutiny against the staff, but what I saw was a bunch of extremely mature responses and apologies, and I'm really proud of this board and all it's members for being able to do so. I know some people won't find it easy to accept many of the apologies, specifically people who were directly mentioned, but what's important is that you guys took the high road and admitted you'd been wrong. And that eased a lot of the tension in this forum.

 

So what I'm trying to say is...

 

Awe shucks, I'm just so happy with everybody.

 

Group hug!!!

 

(Yeah, that was me trying to ease the tension further)

 

Haha.

 

As for my opinion, well, I don't really have one. I don't know the circumstances that led the staff members to say those things, and I'm not going to base an opinion on a one-sided view.

 

My thoughts exactly. I believe everyone has been really mature about this. :] I'm proud of everyone and I think we've already started on the right road to fixing this.

[thebrowncoat]

haha well i know we've never gotten along, and probably won't but i'm okay with that.

 

i like to argue, and you more than anyone argue back.

i don't take anything here too seriously, and i'm never like actually angry while i'm agruing or even really think much about it afterwards. i like stating my opinions and i actually like having you here to clash with.

so sorry if my agruing with you has ever made you mad or anything.

 

ha - no, you've never made me mad. Frustrated, yeah - as you saw But I argue back and forth with Colin in the LJ all the time too...I do kind of like to debate, although I can take things too far...anyway, thanks for having no hard feelings about what I said. I still apologize though.

 

this is exactly how i feel.

 

im only gonna post one time on this.....

 

i commend you on coming clean brent.

 

EDIT: this question pertains to anyone that was talkin shit in the staff room....

im just curious if this would have all come about if diego never ripped Miz Biz or if jarrod wouldnt have pressed the envelope [so to speak]?

 

or would yall still have been talkin shit about some people?

 

i just feel weird about the way that this is all coming out now. ive lost a lot of respect.

 

That's an entirely valid question...and I don't know if I can tell you exactly what would have happened. I will say this - when I was saying the things I said about Jarrod in the staff thread, Diego called me on it - and I realized he was right...I was being a jerk and I apologized for it to him - of course, I apologized to the wrong person, since Jarrod was who I owed the apology.

 

You know...I feel absolutely terrible about what I did and the things I said...but let me see if I can give you some idea where it comes from...I work a full-time job - I'm a Director of Marketing for the company where I work. I wouldn't call it a high stress job, but I have my share of long hours. I've got a wife and two kids that are the most important things to me in this world...yeah, I'm THAT much older than you guys . And I give a lot of time to this site and these boards - as much as I can - because I truly feel Paramore's making a difference in this world - doing something incredibly special that I haven't seen for a long time - building a community through their music, who they are, where I think they're going - it means a tremendous amount to me...I know that might sound overwrought, but it does.

 

And sometimes I log in here to 70 or 80 threads that have new posts in them...and I try to read them all - I try to get through most everything to see what's going on, to keep an eye on things, to make sure everyone's doing ok and that nothing's going on that needs to be deleted or whatever. I try to post new info and news when I get it...and to help people out if they need that too. But with all the other stuff I've got going on in my life, sometimes it's overwhelming...and sometimes it's frustrating to log in and have to deal with the same problems again and again...or see a comment that just strikes me the wrong way because of something else that's happened that day...a lot of times, it wasn't even the particular people I lashed out at that necessarily set me off that time...they were just a target for my frustration and anger. And this didn't happen a lot - I can't say that what Diego showed you was every example...but it's a pretty large sample of it. There's not a lot hiding at this point - in fact, unless I've forgotten something, there's nothing hiding for me - I've apologized to everyone that I've wronged here, I think. If I haven't, I will.

 

It's not an excuse - the behavior is inexcusable - but it is where I think it comes from. I'm not proud of it...but it's what drove what you saw. Did I feel good about it? No. But it was an outlet of sorts, I guess. I can't say for sure whether I would have eventually come clean or not...but I never felt good about myself after I said something cruel or mean. I hope I eventually would have had the guts to fix what I had created...but I can't say for sure. I think I'm a good person - flawed as all get out - but a good person, so I like to think that I would have. I'll absolutely be praying that next time, I do. I'm glad God gave me the strength to do it this time, even if it took a little push.

 

i was actually thinking about this earlier...

 

funny thing is, when paramore wrote in their LJ about being ashamed which somewhat inspired Misery Business...it seems as this has brought out some of the most shamful things on PF.com.

 

life works in very funny ways.

 

I was thinking about that too...we all have things we're ashamed of...and this is certainly one of those things for me. It's kind of interesting that we're discussing all this on the day the video for Misery Business came out. Life really does work in funny ways.

[glorya]

 

EDIT: this question pertains to anyone that was talkin shit in the staff room....

im just curious if this would have all come about if diego never ripped Miz Biz or if jarrod wouldnt have pressed the envelope [so to speak]?

 

or would yall still have been talkin shit about some people?

 

i just feel weird about the way that this is all coming out now. ive lost a lot of respect.

 

I'm going to be completely straight here and say that personally, I never would have come forward if Diego hadn't set the record straight with everyone. The horrible thing is, he's been trying to get us to stop for a long time, not only by telling us, but by being an example of this himself. Before Diego was asked to leave, he rarely posted in the OTST and I'm assuming a lot of that had to do with us making remarks about certain forum members. It's never been more clear too me than it is now...but back to what I was saying. My answer for you is no. It's horrible, but it's the truth. I am so glad that Jarrod and Diego have spoken up though because I've held a lot of these feelings back until today, and it would of been hard to say anything for myself otherwise. They created a gateway for my coming clean, although I was completely distraught about the way it was brought about at first. I know that sounds lame, pathetic, and babyish, but it's true and there's no excuse for it.

 

I like to think of myself as a nice person especially being apart of this community, and so it's hard to hear some people say they've lost respect

 

 

 

^ I agree entirely.

 

I'd already known some of this information beforehand, so my level of shock has somewhat deteriorated.

 

But what did shock me when I logged into this board was the level of peacefulness and calmness. I'll admit, I was expecting a full-scale mutiny against the staff, but what I saw was a bunch of extremely mature responses and apologies, and I'm really proud of this board and all it's members for being able to do so. I know some people won't find it easy to accept many of the apologies, specifically people who were directly mentioned, but what's important is that you guys took the high road and admitted you'd been wrong. And that eased a lot of the tension in this forum.

 

 

^That really touched me.

[kerrie]

this is exactly how i feel.

 

im only gonna post one time on this.....

 

i commend you on coming clean brent.

 

EDIT: this question pertains to anyone that was talkin shit in the staff room....

im just curious if this would have all come about if diego never ripped Miz Biz or if jarrod wouldnt have pressed the envelope [so to speak]?

 

It would have adventually. People have been talking shit about me since the beginning. Not only on here but other places. I stumbled across them, its not like Im that fucking stupid.

[senshuk3n]

glorya, I really believe that your response to this situation, the way you have handled it, has been the best thing for us as a community to have read. This is taking nothing away from what others have said, but I feel like what was most upsetting to people regarding what was said in the staff forum has finally been addressed and is being reconciled. I feel like, although respect has been lost, as upsetting as it has been for all parties, it can be gained back.

 

As disappointed as I was, even though I wasn't directly addressed in any of the images Diego had posted, I did take offense and I was struck by the people it was coming from. Reading Brent's thoughts on it, and now yours, does a lot to ease the tension. It's really encouraging to see people all over coming to realizations, whether it was on their own or helped along. This has become a good situation born out of a bad one. I really, really admire this community for that.

[glorya]

Glorya, I really believe that your response to this situation, the way you have handled it, has been the best thing for us as a community to have read. This is taking nothing away from what others have said, but I feel like what was most upsetting to people regarding what was said in the staff forum has finally been addressed and is being reconciled. I feel like, although respect has been lost, as upsetting as it has been for all parties, it can be gained back.

 

As disappointed as I was, even though I wasn't directly addressed in any of the images Diego had posted, I did take offense and I was struck by the people it was coming from. Reading Brent's thoughts on it, and now yours, does a lot to ease the tension. It's really encouraging to see people all over coming to realizations, whether it was on their own or helped along. This has become a good situation born out of a bad one. I really, really admire this community for that.

 

That made all of the feelings I've delt with and every word I've written since this afternoon worth it. It's been diffcult. Thank you for that. I really do hope that everyone can start to see where we're coming from because I do feel good vibes coming out of all this open honesty...

 

 

 

 

By the way, for those of you who don't know me personally, I know I'm usually referred to as Glo and I refer to myself as Glo too, but my full name is Gloria (glorya is just the online PF alias).