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Rant Thread II


Ashhh
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Ahhhh, I just need to rant. I have been feeling crummy lately. I am stressed about Math and just feeling stressed. I am so tired and feel like I cannot rest. I am about to explode. I do not want to socialize with people or be seen. I just want to be invisible for a day.

Earlier tonight when my friend was helping me with Math I got so frustrated that I just got up and went to my room, not wanting to be talked to or anything. And I cried a little bit. When I finally came back out to face the poor guy, I felt like such an idiot. I still am embarrassed, though he says I should not be. I still am.

I just want to rest is all. To sleep all day and not have any worries or struggles. I know that cannot really happen and that I just need to not stress out so much, but I do not know how to minimize the stress. A lot of people I know can just laugh off a bad grade or an incomplete assignment. Me, on the other hand, I tend to act like it is pretty much the end of the world.

I have been so excited to just get high school over with. Sadly, I am in the ninth grade and will remain in high school until after twelfth grade. It is so far away.

 

I am not a very social person sometimes. I know and talk with a good amount of people. But other than that, I am not one to just put myself out there and make friends. I am not used to being around all these people. I like to be alone. But it is like, not matter where you go, there is always someone you know who is there. It is nice to have people to hang out with, but it always seems as though you cannot find anyone when you want to hang with them, and on bad days, they are all there.

 

I feel so darn frustrated. Like everything is a big circle and I am going around and around and around, haha. Thank God the weekend is coming up. Saturday I can just be left alone to do whatever. No school Monday, thank goodness. Another day I do not have to be seen. Maybe by Tuesday I will get a better attitude and be able to go to school and be fine. Hopefully.

 

Ahhhh, I do not knowww. I need to calm down though. My stomach hurts a bit when I breathe, which always means I am getting too worked up. It is nice to rant. Even if no one reads this, it was still nice to get it out in the open.

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i spent ages playing family guy the video game yesterday and got about a third of the game done then i accidently turned off my ps2 when it was saving, therefore corrupting the data. i'm so stupid sometimes and i'm tired cos i stayed up til 4am getting as far as i was before i made that stupid mistake.

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aww i'm sorry. *gives magical get better hug*

 

i was out all last week cause of my wisdom teeth [well, all 2 days we actually had school], and the last time i was in school we had a bomb scare and we wern't allowed to go to our lockers or anything to get books, so i coudln't study for my physics test i had to make up today. and after a 10 day weekend i completely forgot the little bit that i actually knew. so in study hall i had to cram for the whole chapter in like 35 minutes. then when i went to physics i had to make up the test, making me miss the notes and explanations from today, so now i gotta make that up. and the worst part, i forgot how to do all the problems and stuff, then when i finally remembered i only got about 3 and a half out of 7 done. and there were only 15 multiple choice questions. and to make matters worse, thats the last grade of the marking period thats going in, and before that i had a 74%, and a quiz that i never got the grade back for cause i wasnt' there. now i'm freaked out cause i was doing well in that class for interems, but now i'm going downhill with it, and after 3 years of shitty grades i'm finally getting my parents to trust me and be proud of me, just to probably fail one fucking test and bring it all down, cause of course tests are worth 60% of your grade. omg i'm so freaked out. *bangs head against wall trying to get smarter*

 

 

sorry about all that..

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Me and mom hd a fight last night.

I had to burn some pictures for her and it didn't work out because this computer was too full. Then I said that I've destrioyed every program that we don't use and still we don't have enough space. Then she said "think about how much space you've taken", that was rude. of course here is my music files because I use this computer regulary. I destroed almost my whole music collection. Tegan & Sara, Placebo and Shiny Toy Guns files were saved. I was mad because now I don't have music in this computer. How I'm going to fill my mp3-player? The other computer's PC sucks so much that it even doesn't connect things in the USB-port.

 

No music.

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so i was wearing one of my paramore shirts today, and im walking up to my track locker and i hear some, excuse my language, asshole yell "PARAMORE SUCKS!" and i was like wow wtf you immature peice of, excuse my language, shit. its rly sad how someone could think that about such amazing people. bjhdfgjhfgjhsdgfaffgbksag blah its so lame /=

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^^ I hate kids like that. It's like "Do you want to get your teeth knocked out?"

I wouldn't actually so that but...

 

We have this new kid in our class and he decided to threaten another kid in my class on the first day he was here. I got so mad and said tha if he touched him I would kick his face in cause I got so mad. Like I said before I wuld NEVER do that but the kid he threatened (his name is Angelo) is a really good friend of mine. I mean my whole class is like a family (I'm in an alternative program I only have one class except for drama and planning) and this kid comes in and thinks he can just run his mouth off.

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Goddamnit...

 

Today I've been:

-shouted at.

-nearly rear-ended.

-had to put up with annoying people.

-and been on my feet for what seems like ages.

 

AND to make it a little worse, I got a e-mail from the P-more fanclub saying that M&G winners for the UK tour will be posted soon, suggesting that not everyone will be getting one, despite the original info saying it was guaranteed for everyone who bought a pre-sale ticket.

 

:nono:

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you shoudl watch out for that, you could have kidney problems or something.

 

so i was really excited for like 2 days that emily would be hanging out with me backstage during the play while i was doing curtains, then last night at the show she told me she wasn't able to, and it dissapointed me. and i was still on a monster low from the night before when i had 2 monsters, adn i'm not really supposed to have 1 with my medicine..so i get all out of it and stuff. then my report card came and i had a 71. =[

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My brother is such a dick sometimes. The other day he asked me what I was up to on my laptop and I just said 'Myspaceing'. Then just a while ago I walked by him when he was on his PC and asked 'What cha up to? Facebook?' and he said 'Yes' and looked at me like I'd just insulted his girlfriend.

 

You know, he just thinks he can treat me how he likes and whenever I try to stick up for myself I just get it in the neck. :nono:

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I hope my guitar does not mind being thrown into a lake. BECAUSE THAT IS WHERE IT IS GOING. I am having so much freaking trouble with this song for whatever reason and I am going to kill it. Both the song and the guitar. Kill it alllllll. Throw the guitar into the ocean, get it back, smash it through a window, smash it on the ground so there is a big dent on it, smash it into a tree so that it breaks in half, put it in a mulcher, then eat it for freaking dinner.

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I hope my guitar does not mind being thrown into a lake. BECAUSE THAT IS WHERE IT IS GOING. I am having so much freaking trouble with this song for whatever reason and I am going to kill it. Both the song and the guitar. Kill it alllllll. Throw the guitar into the ocean, get it back, smash it through a window, smash it on the ground so there is a big dent on it, smash it into a tree so that it breaks in half, put it in a mulcher, then eat it for freaking dinner.

:uhh:

poor guitar.

lol.

i'm sure you'll learn it eventually. what song?

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:uhh:

poor guitar.

lol.

i'm sure you'll learn it eventually. what song?

 

Haha, my guitar is abused. The song is Flyleaf's "Christmas Song." It is so easy, but I am having trouble because I practiced for eight hours yesterday and my fingers are raw. I cannot move 'em to get 'em to play =[ No pain no gain though.

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Haha, my guitar is abused. The song is Flyleaf's "Christmas Song." It is so easy, but I am having trouble because I practiced for eight hours yesterday and my fingers are raw. I cannot move 'em to get 'em to play =[ No pain no gain though.

 

indeed it is! the guitar protection service is gunna git you cheyenne ;)

but hey....here's something to keep in mind. Even if you can't get it, you're better at it then me. :D

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